“Ah ah ah. Ah ah ah. Ah ah… Ah.” – TS
330. again. block, in pencil. drafting; rethinking; drafting. turn it off. more sleep, sort of. up again. blocks, in cobblestone. diorite. glass. ready — go! don’t overthink it. think about how to not overthink it. coffee. not too much. tasks, like killing flies. more writing. reading yesterday’s terrible ideas. what?! now!? how? FILDI. worked. somehow. walk, cold and clear, locked. crap. waiting. check clock. don’t check clock again. check clock. be early, not too early. don’t check clock again. didn’t check clock. ok, let’s go. table, chairs, okay. intro. heading 1. paragraph 1. heading… blah blah blah, loop, bigword, blah blah blah. but holding it together, landing some ideas, not going fractal. meta is bad, meta is boring. say what you’re gonna say or do what you’re gonna do; don’t say what you’re gonna say or do, you know? if you can’t take a risk on being real, why’d you come here at all? okay, that’s one. stop — what the fuck? what are the odds? well played. wow, impressive. back to it. focused, all in. surreal, the clarity amongst the noise. simple enough; i set out a piece and wait to see if you match it. you do. i set out two pieces and wait to see if you match them. you do. go. what? really? wow. uh huh. yes. me, too. ok! and there gets to be like this third thing — sketching on the tabletop with my hands, which, it ends up, i’m pretty good at. philosopher turned potter, luxury, secrets. glancing; will revisit later. my ideas stick: good. no guarantees of ever not screwing things up. so good, being understood. not hard, or expensive, but is there anything better, really? plans. weights & pulleys. hand-writing. third thing optional; almost home now. whoosh! well, there it goes, like a balloon let loose into the sky. seeya, balloon! — no coming back from that. and… it’s fine. go, balloon, go. smart, instincts. how you can thread the needle without actually having to thread the needle seems ridiculously lucky. paid dues, but this overpaid is nuts. even an insane machine can guess right at random intervals. don’t change your plans… everything counts… oh — one last thing: big smile. good, good, great, thank you. ok, wrap. thanks, thanks, thanks. weasel back. no way… clean? clean.
“Ooh oh oh oh oh, oh whoa oh oh oh.”